If you are a clown in their circus no one will see if you are sad because you have a painted on smile. You are saying to the world that I am fine but you are not fine at all. You want to be loved even if you do not entertain them. You make them smile while making your ownself sad. You deserve love even if you do not please others. Earned love is short lived while love that is given freely is everlasting.
Maybe it will be hard for you to understand what I am saying if you can live in this world with a peaceful spirit you will feel loved. Once you let go of trying to please everyone you will feel free. There is a freedom to just being yourself and not caring what others think about you. If people can be themselves, why can't you be yourself? You deserve nothing less. May peace and love always be with you.